Inside Out

Finding Level Ground

2012-01-23T13:40:00.000-08:00

There is an old wooden level on a shelf above my computer. Marvin Thiessen, one of our faithful volunteers used it for years as he worked on projects around the Evangel Home. When he left us about 10 years ago he told me to keep the level because he wouldn’t need it any more. I kept it in a desk drawer, found it during a recent cleaning flurry, and decided it needed a place of honor. So it is now poised slightly below eye level as I look at my computer screen.

I kept it because it was a wonderful memory of Marvin, but now I display because it is a pointed reminder of God. I can mock the wisdom of the world, and I can worry about the problems of Evangel Home. However, in the end, it is my responsibility to keep the bubble in the middle — to keep my relationship with Him level.

Because my desk isn’t quite level, the bubble is never in the middle. Pencils roll off of the desk, but I can adjust to the slight imbalance. I can adjust, but in order to be totally level – to get that bubble in the middle – I need help. Isn’t that what our relationship with Jesus is all about? We need His help to stay balanced in a world that is full of subtle inclines and steep curves. Many choose to negotiate the terrain on their own, and like that bubble suspended in the yellow liquid of Marvin’s level, their lives constantly move from side to side and end to end.

Thank you for helping us provide our women and children a place where they can find solid ground and understand what it means to stay balanced in Christ.

The Charlie Brown Truth

2011-12-07T11:18:00.000-08:00

A recent conversation with some friends about why we love Charlie Brown Christmas prompted one to say, “We are now the counter-culture trying to follow the truth and tradition of Christmas.”

In Charlie Brown Christmas, it seems that Linus represents the counter culture, the truth of Christmas, and Charlie Brown’s cute little sister, Sally, IS the culture. Somehow Charlie Brown is the guy who brings it all together.

Sally asks him to write her letter to Santa as she dictates her list. She tells Santa he can make it easy on himself by just bringing her cash if it’s easier than meeting her list of demands. “I prefer tens and twenties. All I want is what I have coming to me. All I want is my fair share.”

Eventually her big brother cries out, “Isn’t there anyone who knows what Christmas is all about?”

Little Linus, dragging his blanket behind him, says he can explain it and he then recites the Christmas story from Luke 2: 8-14.

“That’s what Christmas is all about Charlie Brown.”

The show ends with all the children humming Hark the Herald Angels Sing and Charlie Brown remembering the words of Linus: “This will be a sign to you . . .”

It is our prayer that our women and children find the true meaning of Christmas, and can escape the bonds of false cultural idols; that they will find new life in His life this Christmas.

Thank you for helping us tell them the truth.

Amazing Grace in Action

2011-09-24T13:54:00.000-07:00

This year’s Evangel Home banquet was quite an evening. It was filled with enough images, moments, and emotions to share with others for a long time. Rick Alonzo has an amazing gift and uses it to glorify God through his paintings. There was a lot of glory in the room that night!

Two “short stories” I want to share here came after the activities were over--sort of when no one was looking. Each shows the true character of the women, Char and Aziza, who so bravely stood before 400 people and gave their testimonies.

Char said she had been a serious drug user and thief, among other things, for many years. She graduated from our GARDEN program in 2002, but went back to her self- destructive lifestyle before God grabbed her attention for good a few years ago. After the banquet was over, she mentioned to Patty Lehman (our office manager) that she wanted to buy one of Rick’s posters, and Patty gave her $10 to do so.

When Char chose the poster she wanted, Rick told her there was no charge. She couldn’t find Patty to return the $10, so she gave me the crumpled bill and asked me to please give it back to Patty. That kind of clarity and honesty would not have happened in Char’s dark days. It was one more way for her to show, not only share, how Christ has changed her.

The second after-banquet moment happened when I got to work the next morning and found a note from Aziza on my desk. In part it says, “Tonight was an eye opener. People I didn’t know were thanking me for my testimony. Wow! My testimony. Something I had been ashamed of. Thank you for believing in me when I don’t believe in myself. For always pushing me to do better.

“I was honored when you asked me to speak. I hope that I can live up to your standards. But most importantly God’s standards.”

Thank you for investing in these women’s lives in so many ways. Luke 15 contains stories of the lost sheep, the lost coin, and the prodigal son. After each of those lost things is found, there is rejoicing in heaven and a party on earth. We’ve been to a party!

Rick Alonzo to Highlight Evangel Home Banquet, September 20th

2011-08-04T15:31:00.000-07:00

Our annual banquet is just around the corner, and I am particularly excited about this year's special guest.

Salt Magazine recently ran an exciting article about Rick which included the following description: “Rick is rarely still; he throws paint, leaps, kicks and whirls nunchaku. He is propelled by his faith, his calling and his belief in his community. Rick’s presentations are part performance art, part testimony and message, part entertainment, and all about serving Jesus Christ.

“A typical presentation includes Rick creating a painting on a blank canvas. He uses his hands and arms and a variety of tools to sling, dab and smear color and create a masterpiece in a matter of minutes.”

Doesn’t that sound exciting? In addition, you might find yourself taking home one of Rick's masterpieces. We will have a live auction of the pieces he paints on stage that night, and Rick will have items available for sale.

I am also excited about this year’s testimonies because we will hear from family members in addition to hearing from our women.

Paint us on your calendar for Tuesday, September 20. The banquet will once again be at the Radisson Hotel in Fresno and will begin at 6:30 p.m. Tickets are $30 each and tables seat 10. You can register online through our website at www.evangelhome.org or give us a call at 559-264-4714 and ask for Patty Dykstra.

Hope to see you there. I promise you won’t get splattered with paint -- but even then it would be worth it!

Reflections on 23 Years at the Helm of the Home

2011-05-17T11:58:00.000-07:00

"God's call and Daniel's name; Janice's artichoke and Justice's game;
but most of all Jesus."

May 16, 1988 is the day I began life at Evangel Home. From my perspective today, I realize how blessed I am to be involved in something that has turned out to be my life's work. Some of it is serious; some sad. There are painful decisions and joyful celebrations. Confident decisions are sometimes shadowed by doubt, and focused faith sometimes blinks. Still, I would not trade this for any other experience.

When I first arrived here, I just knew without a doubt it was God's call on my life. Yet within a few days, I thought He had made a mistake. So I called my pastor (Doug Rumford) and asked him, pleaded with him, to please give God a call. Obviously God had the wrong number when He had dialed me. Doug prayed and reminded me that when God calls, He equips. I just needed to trust that I was where He wanted me to be. I'm trusting to this day.

Most of my thoughts today are of the women and children I have been blessed to know. I learned the importance of knowing the name of every woman and child here from 9-year old Daniel. Someone had purchased a new pair of shoes for him and when I presented him with the box his first response was, "You remembered my name." Yes, Daniel, I remember your name.

I learned the need to set personal boundaries and still understand what has shaped others from Janice. She also provided some of the best laughter such as the day in the lunch line when she looked at the big bowl of perfectly cooked artichokes and said,"What? You people eat boiled pinecones?" Yes, Janice we do, and thank you for teaching us the importance of experience and perspective. Artichokes to some are pinecones to others.

There was 8-year-old Justice, a child without a childhood, who waited for me outside my office one day and said, "May I challenge you to a game of Candyland?" I said no at first because there were more pressing and "important" things to do, but I realized at that moment nothing was more important than her invitation. So I changed my mind, accepted her challenge, and she beat me fair and square two times. She talked about that for days, and I will remember it forever.

And just this month a 2002 graduate said something that really sticks with me. After graduation from Evangel Home she soon returned to her life of self-destruction. She had no friends or family who could help her; no job; no church; no hope, but a tiny bit of faith. She said there was nothing. "It was just me. Just me and Jesus." She has been back on track now for 4 years, and is truly a woman of God.

I admire each woman who is brave and humble enough to ask us for help. I am so grateful that many of you are still connected to Evangel Home and doing so well. You have all helped me play my part here. Today my part is simply to help God tell His story through each of us.

God's call and Daniel's name; Janice's artichoke and Justice's game; but most of all Jesus.

I believe many people could run Evangel Home, and one day someone will. However, God put me here to work on me. He's still very busy.

"Just Me and Jesus"

2011-05-09T20:21:00.000-07:00

It’s always good to visit with Evangel Home graduates, and I was recently challenged by a conversation with a young woman who graduated in 2002.

She seemed to do well, and kept up appearances, for several years after she left us – worked, maintained a home, attended church; seemed to be doing the right things. However, she was drawn back to the destructive lifestyle she had escaped and slowly began to lose everything again.

Everything that is except a flicker of faith, and God fanned the flicker into a flame. Once again she looks great, is working, has her relationships back in order and keeps her hand locked in God’s grip.

I asked what got her back on track since she had admitted to being "really way out there." She recalled that one night she was on her way to getting loaded again -- ready to do drugs and watch TV. The program was a Christian show and she heard someone read the verse James 5:14. It became her rebounding point. “Is any one of you sick? He shall call the elders of the church to pray over him and anoint him with oil in the name of the Lord.”

Only problem she said, “I didn’t have any elders. I wasn’t in church. It was just me. Just me and Jesus.”

So she walked to the corner liquor store, bought a bottle of olive oil, took it home, anointed herself and prayed to be free of her addiction. She said she felt His presence then as never before and prayed that she would be delivered from the dark world she had slipped back into.

It has been four years since that night, and this woman is now pretty solid. Her life is not only a testimony to Christ's power, it is a warning to all of us about how easily we can lose everything; how quickly we can become ensnared in our own dark habits.

We in the Christian world may disagree about such things as music styles, church politics, evangelism, who's a sinner and who is saved. These things might affect how we worship and what church we attend, but they should never diminish whom we worship and what we do for Him.

After all, it really does come down to just you and Jesus. "Just me and Jesus.”

Scrappy Finds a Home

2011-02-18T16:13:00.000-08:00

The parallels between an abandoned dog and many of our women and children are easily apparent. The tired look and sad eyes; fear of the past and suspicion of the present; total unawareness of anything better, but always looking for something beyond just survival.

Scrappy, The Gremlin as she is now affectionately known, is the most recent of our animals. She joins Hazlenut, the cat, in defending our apartments against mice, wild cats, and trespassers. She follows in the paw steps of Jobie, our first stray who lived with us for 10 years. Hazlenut who follows Yosemite, the Siamese, who now lives with one of our graduates in semi retirement.

I will never forget the day 15 years go when I discovered Jobie in the apartments. The kids had been hiding him and feeding him their favorite foods -- watermelon, cheetos, ice cream and occasionally some fried chicken. Every square inch of his fur was tangled and every part of his skin seemed to have a wound, a tick or a flea. He was just pathetic, and when I said, "You are such a mess," one of our women responded, "Don't forget we're all a mess when we first get here."

Those are almost the same words the women use now in describing how there is hope for Scrappy, the gremlin dog.

Before our women named this unusual looking little dog Scrappy, she was a neighborhood stray. She lived across the street in a bad situation and kept running over to our apartments every chance she got. One day the dog's owners moved away and left her to fend for herself. Didn't take her long to squeeze under our fence once again; then her visits became more frequent and lasted longer.

It has taken several months, but she now seems comfortable with most of our CrossRoads women and follows them around. Her initial fear and suspicion gave way to a tentative curiosity about this new place with all the nice people. She is now taking those first steps toward a better life.

Scrappy will either stay with us or move on with one of our soon-to-graduate women. Whether she stays here or moves on, her life will be much better. She is not a stray any longer.

Do You Help Someone You Know is Lying?

2011-01-17T08:56:00.000-08:00

Answer: Sometimes.

Scene 1: Church Parking Lot Downtown Fresno
Act 1: Grungy 30-something woman approaches me and says,
"I don't want money, but . . ." She went on to say that she, her husband, and her two children had just come to Fresno from Oakland, were staying in a motel, and needed food.

Lesson 1: Everyone who approaches you really wants money, no matter what they say.

Act 2: I suggested that she call Evangel Home, and since I work there, I would make sure she could get some food. She said she had already done that and been told that we only give canned food. Since she didn't have a can opener, this wouldn't work.

Lesson 2: No point to tell them you know they are lying.

Scene 2: My car
Act 3: I offer to take her to the Evangel Home where I will personally make her a food box. She says OK, and off we go. I do ask that she places her backpack in the back seat.

Lesson 3: Always be suspicious no matter how well intentioned you are.

Act 4: Conversation in the car reveals that she has stayed at Evangel Home in the past, and didn't like it because she said someone was rude to her. She tells me that her two children loved it there, and that they are doing very well. She also says that she has left them at her church (she doesn't know the name) and will get them later.

Lesson 4: Once the lies and cover ups begin, you alone cannot stop them.

Scene 3: Evangel Home Kitchen
Act 5: We arrive at the Evangel Home, I explain to the staff member on duty and the 2 residents helping prepare lunch that "Rayanne" needs some food. I give them a few details, "Rayanne" is now amazed because she knows she has told me she didn't like Evangel Home. She is aware I might be suspicious of her story, and we are helping her anyway? Thinking of her two children, we even give her some toys and clothes.

Lesson 5: Always remember those acts you are performing might not be for you or the person you are helping, but for someone else watching from the sidelines or involved in some other way--someone God is moving into place. The message sent to the 2 residents helping her is multi-facted and strong. They were thankful not to be in her position, and amused that they were working so diligently to help someone they knew was not telling the truth but beginning to question herself.

Scene 4: Motel
Act 6: I drive "Rayanne" to the motel where she is staying because we have given her way too much stuff to carry -- even a can opener for that canned food we put in the box. Her "husband" is there in the parking lot to help (she used our phone to call him), and I offer to carry one of the bags to the door. They allow me to actually go into the room where I observe there is one unmade bed and not one bit of evidence that children are there. Thank goodness, actually.

Lesson 6: Pick up the pieces and pray. Maybe, just maybe, "Rayanne" saw something in all of this that will convict her she is on the wrong path and she will truly want to become a Christ Follower. However, in the mean time, those two GARDEN residents have taken one more step in the right direction.

When to Take an Aspirin and When to Pray

2011-01-10T11:21:00.000-08:00

Some of the wisest counsel I ever heard was actually in a conversation I overheard. It was during a morning chapel service several years ago when one of our residents asked for prayer for her headache -- for about the 5th time. Florence, the wise woman leading chapel that day asked the woman if she had taken any aspirin and then she said, "God will not do for us what we can do for ourselves."

Take an aspirin. Say a prayer. It's OK to do both.

Some things can only be taken care of with prayer but other things just need a little change or adjustment on our part. Complaining never fixes or changes anything. It only deepens the victim mentality that we can all slip into.

Florence's advice came to mind this morning as I read about Moses and the people he was leading who were always complaining about something.

Exodus 17:2 provides a quick summary: So they quarreled with Moses and said, "Give us water to drink."
Moses replied,
"Why do you quarrel with me? Why do you put the Lord to the test?"

The devotional content from Life Application Bible Study gives the following reminder:

"The people complained about their problems instead of praying. Some problems can be solved by careful thought or rearranging our priorities. Some can be solved by discussion and good counsel (or taking an aspirin). But some problems can be solved only by prayer. We should make a determined effort to pray when we feel like complaining because complaining only raises our level of stress. Prayer quiets our thoughts and emotions, and prepares us to listen."

Lord, give us ears to hear but hearts to listen.

Ponder Briefly; Pray Boldly

2011-01-05T12:10:00.000-08:00

There is one brief blank moment between the celebration of what was and the embracing of what will be. That is the moment of commitment -- to ponder briefly and to pray boldly. Whether it's the change in year or the change in hour, whether the difference is on a calendar or a clock, there must remain that blank moment when we give the time and space to God.

"Resolution" -- the word so commonly paired with the new year is nowhere to be found in the Bible. And so I will simply but sincerely just try giving Him more opportunity to fill in the blank space.

Stepping Up and Moving In -- A Christmas Letter

2010-12-03T06:32:00.000-08:00

Seems that the annual Christmas letter is a way to let everyone know what your family has been doing, and this is a good opportunity for us to do just that. The Evangel Home family has been busy helping the homeless women and children who come to our door. In addition, we spent much time, effort, and energy taking care of one of our own -- Maxine Miller.

Maxine has been involved one way or another with this ministry since the beginning in 1955. She was quite the "tool woman"-- always fixing things and carrying at least one flashlight "just in case . . . ." Even at the age of 80, we found "work" for her and paid her for 6 hours a week no matter what the activity was.

Last year we began to see changes in Maxine. She would forget to come to work; become agitated at certain times of the day; and was losing weight. She was diagnosed with Alzheimer's, but continued to live independently until this past summer. We checked in on her a lot and brought her here for many meals and conversations. We spoke frankly with Max about selecting some people who could walk with her as her steps faltered. She chose some of the Evangel Home staff to walk the path and called us her committee.

Several members of the "committee" are graduates of Evangel Home programs--women whom Maxine looked out for when they were in the program and she was a house manager. Now they were looking out for her. Someone had to step in and help her out. Maxine has no family and so the "someone" ended up being us. She fought help and began to ride the city bus all day often ending up with us for dinner. Then a staff member would take her home.

It became obvious that the time had come to get Maxine more help. We even brought her here to keep her safe until a more appropriate place could be found. We explained to all the residents that Maxine was one of the family and would be staying with us for awhile. They were more than happy to help. The first night she was here, the housemanager on duty asked her to say the dinner blessing. Although a bit confused and not happy about being here against her will, Maxine didn't miss a beat and offered the prayer she probably prayed hundred of times when she was on staff.

Maxine is now at a very nice assisted living home. She is physically healthy, but losing her memory. She is still sweet and funny, and we have learned that you join people on this journey. You don't fight them. When she says she needs to find where she parked her car, we walk with her and then say we'll try again tomorrow. When she calls and says she has lost her bed, we assure her she is OK for the night and then ask to speak to the attendant who is right with her. Of course she is not going to lose her bed, but still that is her reality for the moment.

The "Committee" helped her move in to her new place in November and then had lunch with her. She still carries a flashlight (at least a small one in her purse) and wants someone else to pay the lunch tab; she likes her red lipstick and jeans that are too big; she calls one of us every night, prays for people when asked, and says she is "traveling light" because she will be going home tomorrow.

She won't be going home tomorrow, but we will be going to see her and have lunch again.

Why We Don't Accept Government Funds

2010-06-01T16:29:00.000-07:00

I try to avoid controversy in these postings so that we can keep our focus on the mission of Evangel Home. However, recent events in the news and one indelible memory have nudged me out of my comfort zone.

The news topics have included the city's plan to end homelessness in 10 years and the recent stories of people soliciting money from street corners (see my January 30 post called "Please Give Her Our Phone Number"). It will be good for Fresno if the plan succeeds; if a balance is found between compassion for the truly homeless and concern for the city. Evangel Home is not part of the city-wide effort to deal with this issue. Here's why:

We used to accept government food -- peanut butter, eggs, cheese, and canned meat. A truck would arrive at the Home periodically, we would unload the cans and boxes, sign a paper, thank the driver, and put the food on the shelves with our other food donations.

Then we were informed that we were required to complete a detailed inventory of the items. That seemed reasonable and was the system for several years. But then another change came. We were told that the food could not be stored with our other donations and it would have to kept in a special "government food" section. Sounded a little odd, but we wanted the food, so we built special shelves for it.

But then one day yet another new contract came. I will never forget the paragraph printed above the line where I was to sign that we agreed with the terms. It said that we could not accept the food if we "practice religious influence or coercion." The leap from "influence" to "coercion" was one of the strangest and steepest jumps I have ever seen. Yet, it brought about one of our easiest decisions.

Our mission is not to coerce anyone. However, our desire is to influence the women who come into our home and into our programs. How could we claim to be a Christian ministry and pretend that our faith makes no difference in how we operate? How could we pray, "In the Name of Jesus," yet refuse to speak His name? There could be no greater lack of integrity than to deny Him for money or food or any of a number of things that are presented to us.

So we declined the government food that day and have ever since. Once in awhile we run short of something, but the need is ALWAYS met by people like you who believe in what we are doing -- friends who never ask us to store their food donations in a special section.

The Fresno Bee concluded its recent report on the city's initiative by saying, "The funds would be granted to area non-profits and public providers who are working to implement Fresno's 10-year homelessness plan."

That means Evangel Home won't be getting any homelessness plan funding. We are fine with that because we know that we must have the freedom to speak about Christ, pray in His name, and guide women into personal relationships with Him.

Servant Leadership Unleashed

2010-04-15T05:54:00.000-07:00

Roofing material has arrived and crews from The Well Community Church and Every Neighborhood Partnership will descend on Evangel Home this weekend to replace our apartment roofs, install new doors, and put up "beautiful" new rain gutters. We had no idea that rain gutters came with designs and could be beautiful since the only patterns we have ever seen are rust.

During Easter Break, Campus Crusade brought in bulldozers, scooped out layers of mounded dirt in our apartments, put in a new sprinkling system and rolled out a carpet of beautiful greed sod.

During this same time high schoolers from First Presbyterian Church replaced a large wooden fence in the GARDEN backyard.

No words can express our gratitude to these humble followers of Christ who simply want to serve. The changes and improvements you are all making affect so much more than appearances and even comfort or safety.

You are impacting a neighborhood in a big and immediate way. You are helping change lives of women and children in a very tangible way. Most important, the ripple effects of your labors are creating a tidal wave that just might wash someone up on the shores of the Kingdom.

Pretty exciting, don't you think?

And We Worship

2010-03-01T20:20:00.000-08:00

First Presbyterian Church of Fresno is one of 80 churches that support Evangel Home. It is special to us because of its faithfulness and many ways of support. It is special to me personally because it has been my church home and family for more than 20 years. So the recent death of Jamie Evans, our pastor and friend for almost 10 years, is a loss that I feel deeply.

Jamie battled depression and its effects for years. When he couldn't battle anymore, he took his life on February 25, 2010. The pain we feel now is miniscule in comparison to what he must have felt. The battle we now wage with our emotions and the questions we ask are dim shadows compared to the sharp and blinding emotions and questions he battled with increasing frequency.

His family did everything possible. His church did everything possible. Jamie did everything possible. Yet he is gone, and we are left with pain and questions. David Abdo, associate pastor at First Pres, addressed this in his sermon February 28. David said he wanted to mention just 5 simple things, yet they add up to one great truth: "And We Worship."

1. Life is sometimes difficult, and we worship.
2. Life has questions, and we worship.
3. God is gracious, and we worship.
4. God is generous, and we worship.
5. God is in control, and we worship.

One young woman said Jamie pointed us to Jesus. We know that recovery and healing for First Pres will be a long steep climb. However, we also know that Jesus will lead the way and He will use Jamie's tragedy for His triumph.

And we will worship.

Gold Medal for Candyland Winner

2010-02-19T12:56:00.000-08:00

The Olympics and all the excitement of winning medals reminded me of an Evangel Home "gold medal" from the past. Only it wasn't for skiing or skating; it was for winning a Candyland game.

Last year a woman and her two children came to our door. They came in and waited on the sofa in the living room to see if they would be able to stay. I remember the woman looking dazed after moving from place to place for months; the 4-year-old autistic boy couldn't sit still; and the 10-year-old girl was sobbing in a way that broke each of our hearts. As most oldest kids in this situation, she had become the parent of the family and was carrying the weight of their world on her little shoulders.

Children always do well here, and these two were no exception. They soon adjusted to the loving support and regular routine that surrounded and "boundaried" them. The little girl's name is Justice. She is a good student, and even with her mom's many moves, Justice took her school lessons seriously. Perhaps because of the instability in her home life, school was one of her lifelines.

On one particular Friday, Justice was sitting at the dining room table just outside of my door. She was camped out there so that I would see her when I came back to the office. Late Friday is a good time for me to finish the odds and ends left over from the week, and my plan was to finish those loose ends that seemed to tangle my desk in knots.

Justice was perched in typical kid pose: knees on the chair and elbows on the table, but she sprung straight up and said, "May I challenge you to a game of Candyland?"

"No honey. I have lots of work to do right now," I said and walked into my office.

Deadlines loomed. Important plans, projects, and papers waited to be finished but suddenly nothing seemed more important than that little girl and Candyland. So I marched back to the dining room and said, "I accept your challenge."

"You will?" She laughed, ran off to get the game and set up the board. She was even more excited when she beat me -- a victory she talked about all weekend. By Monday morning, it seemed the entire block knew about her victory. She was the champion, and she had defeated the challenger fair and square -- not once but twice.

We each have Candyland opportunities everyday. Blessings come when we accept the challenge to play the game. We can each be part of the training process for another Candyland champ.

Let the games begin!

Please Give Her our Phone Number: 264.4714

2010-01-30T08:33:00.000-08:00

What's in a number? Maybe a new direction and a chance for real help.

If you spend any time at all in Fresno, you know about the people who make their living holding up signs on traffic medians. This is not just a local problem. It is in cities across the nation. I have spent lots of time thinking about these people and why it is I am so bothered by them. The bottom line is that the majority are not homeless. They rely on the compassion of strangers to maintain their lifestyle, and they use guilt to produce their intended results.

There are avenues of help for these people, but they refuse to take a different path.

I have personally talked with many of the "median homeless." I have offered the women a place to stay at Evangel Home. However, they prefer to stand for hours doing nothing but holding a sign and looking pitiful. By now I can predict the reasons they will give me for not getting real help. They don't like the rules. They don't want religion "forced" on them. It's their freedom-of- speech right to stand in the road with a sign. They don't want their checks going somewhere else and having someone know their business. Most of them have post office boxes or an address for mail. Some listen to me, take my card and are very polite, but we never hear from them.

And so they pass up the opportunity for real help in order to continue their scam on the compassionate public. That is what I find so troubling. There are places for these folks to get help, but they don't want it. This is not the city's fault. It is not the system's fault. It is the choice of this group to make their living in this way.

Evangel Home offers one of the best alternatives to women who truly want help. If you decide to give money to a woman on a median, please also give her our phone number: 559.264.4714. She'll probably have a cell phone.

She Stands at the Door and Knocks

2010-01-17T18:36:00.000-08:00

One of the most agonizing things that happens in the Evangel Home family is when a graduate falls back into the deadly and fast-moving river of alcoholism. It is heart-breaking and maddening at the same time to see a good Christian woman trying to come up for air as she is carried in that wicked current again. Some women never get out of the current, some drown in it, and some beg for a second, third, or fourth chance.

A 2009 graduate recently jumped into that river, and as we tried to pull her out, she drank more and sank out of sight for 8 days. She wandered the streets, drank herself into a stupor, and contacted no one. Staff talked about what we would do if she came back. We prayed for her safety and we grieved with women at Evangel Home who are her friends. I will call her "Monica."

Go back with me several years to 2005 when another such woman, Jennifer, was killed in a hit and run accident in Madera. Her death still affects us. On January 13, 2010, the memory of Jennifer and the struggles of "Monica" met. I received an email from an old college friend of Jennifer's named Jeff. He described their friendship in the 90's at a Christian college in Pennsylvania. Then he told me about wondering about his old friend, how his search led to an article in the Madera Tribune about her tragic death, and finally to the Evangel Home website and an archived newsletter.

Here are some of his words: "I saw the short article about her; her graduation from your program in 2002 and her death in 2005. . .

"My fear was confirmed. My old friend is gone."

"I realize I'm a little more than a random voice from the great void of the internet, but as I mourn for the loss of my friend tonight, I just wanted to send you a warm thank you on behalf of myself and others who knew Jenn. . . for taking care of her when she needed it most; for continuing to do Kingdom Work that matters on behalf of our Lord Jesus. Thank you, too, for printing that article in your newsletter and including a picture of Jenn with the words from the day of her graduation that touched me so:

" 'This day is definitely NOT all about me. It's about all of you sitting here. It's about those who helped me even when others may not have. Those who helped me stay at Evangel Home and those who helped me to stay focused.

" 'A lot of you sacrificed so that I could be here today, and I hope you see a small reward for all your efforts.' "

Jeff finished his thoughts with these words: "I don't know who will read this, if anyone at all, but I knew Jenn. I know what it must have meant for her to say those words. I would do anything to have been there when she needed me after she left college, but it is a great comfort to know that you were there."

I was so moved by the words of this man I had never heard of that I called him. We had a wonderful talk and I shared with him how Evangel Home struggles when what happened to Jenn happens to others -- when a graduate so full of promise and life, returns to drinking and all the darkness and death it brings. I shared with him about "Monica" and our conflicted thoughts about what we would do if she returned. If she just knocked at the door once more.

Within an hour of my phone conversation with Jeff, there was a knock at the door. It was "Monica." She was still under the influence, but we could not question the Other influence in this scene.

God had wrestled her out of the current -- partly by using the words in that email and partly through the ensuing conversation between two people who had never spoken before. We will now start over with "Monica."

I am grateful to Jeff for taking the time to find his old friend and in this way helping Evangel Home throw a rescue line to "Monica." All of us have a deeper and richer faith as a result of this "perfect storm" -- flooded with tears for Jenn, buoyed by belief, and once again keenly aware that God orchestrates our every move when we let Him.

As Romans 8:28 promises: "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose."